His Majesty To Censor Press

His Majesty King Thomas Carroll of Gosling has called for the immediate censorship of all press sources he personally deems as "offensive". This initiative was put forth on the forums of the MNN a few days ago and, despite calls for sanity from all sides, he has pushed forward with his plan to silence anyone he doesn't like. His Majesty first proposed the idea, and then defended it in a series of speeched delivered to the MNN participants. But what few know is that the speech he actually delivered is slightly different from the speech he originally wrote!

TMI has obtained this exclusive copy of the speech His Majesty originally intended give. It was left on his personal desk in his office and our mystery reporter was able to take it unobserved. Rather than reproduce the whole speech here, which is laboriously boring to read, we present the salient paragraph that outlines his true intentions.

Speech as delivered:

well, the purpose isnt to try and shut down the offending organisation, but more to warn them that people have found whast they have publicised offending. we wont have powers to shut them down, thats silly! but we will be there so that people can pass on their concerns to us.

Speech as intended (**'s added to show where his speech writers softened his message):

well, the purpose is ** to try and shut down the offending organisation, *** **** to warn them that people have found whast they have publicised offending. we **** have powers to shut them down, ***** *****! *** we will be there so that people can pass on their concerns to us.

TMI does not see how it could be any clearer. The King thinks he has the right and power to squelch any opposition. Of course, TMI cannot allow such arrogance to continue unheralded. The world must unite to tell this King, in the words of the Minister from Lovely "Piss off".

Censorship has reared its ugly head many times before, and it cannot be tolerated. Those who are afraid of criticism are unworthy of leadership positions. Being on the pedestal means being able to take all forms of review from fawning to loathing with a stoic attitude that is above the battle. Like the King of Gotzborg, you can anything about that man and he is just as likely to ignore you as to invite you to a palace ball (hint hint).

Mystery Reporter